banana talk...

Day 2 in Tokyo

2006-10-26T01:55:00.000-07:00

I'm here!!!! In one piece, too!

God is good. I made it through the flight without puking :D I almost missed my flight (from Vancouver to Japan because of a delay in Toronto) but I made it right when they were doing the last boarding call! 15 hours of sleeping and eating and watching TV.

However, my luggages aren't here. But that is okay because they will be delivered to me tomorrow. I am currently staying with my host family in Tokyo and they are absolutely awesome! I am being taken care of :D

I must say, it still doesn't feel like I'm away from home/Canada! But it should hit me soon!

More updates to come later!

2006-10-16T06:48:00.000-07:00

I have decided to start a blog dedicated to my time in Japan :D

http://annatoinjapan.blogspot.com/

2006-10-15T18:38:00.000-07:00

prayer letters will be sent out this week. Message me if you want to be spammed by me, and I'll be more than glad to :D

I am currently feeling a bit...sad. Dad is going on vacation on wednesday so that's our last day together until I come back. Not sure what to think or feel. Mixed feelings...all over the place. Prayers needed.

Thankful for:
-brisk walks with daddy after dinner
-caring friends who ask me every week, "Why are you still here?!" (love you guys)
-travelling agent who put up with me and my ten thousand question
-the pre-Japan challenges & the lesson (i.e. humility) taught in the process
-realizing these blessings and many more in my life :D

God is good all the time. All the time, God is good.

2006-10-13T20:32:00.000-07:00

Went down to get my visa done today. Managed to talk the lady there to have it done by tuesday the 17th...hoping I can leave on the 18th. Hahhaa..there is hope! Called the travelling agency: everything is booked; the 18th is full. the next available time is 21st. Haha...well then, 24th it is! All coincidence? Well, let's see what's in store for me for the next 10 days in Toronto :D Dun dun duuuuunnnnnnn....

2006-10-12T12:19:00.000-07:00

Wow. It's been a rough ride. Who would have thought that waiting for a piece of document could be so frustrating? With Japan, things got delayed...super delayed. Now with the delivery service...more delay. They should really use mapquest or something...googlemap! How is it a "bad address" when that's the address that all my mail arrives to?! What's going on? I'm starting to think that I'm not supposed to hit Korea before Japan and actually leave on the 24th rather than the 18th. We shall see. God speed.

Unashamed Love.

2006-10-11T14:37:00.000-07:00

You're calling me to lay aside the worries of my day
To quiet down my busy mind and find a hiding place
Worthy, Worthy
I open up my heart and let my spirit worship Yours
I open up my mouth and let a song of praise come forth
Worthy, You are worthy

Of a child-like faith
And of my honest praise
And of my unashamed love
Of a holy lifeAnd of my sacrifice
And of my unashamed love

Lord, You are worthy. A song much needed to hear to give me a lil kick.

that big brown truck

2006-10-10T19:53:00.000-07:00

Expecting for my entry permit to be sent to me either today or tomorrow, I've been feeling a bit anxious all day. Looking out the window every now and then, I felt like a mother waiting for her son to come back home from war. Anyway, everytime I heard a vehicle drive by, I would peer out the window, hoping to see that big brown UPS truck. I gave up around 2:30pm. Then, at 2:39pm, I hear a big momma truck run through the speed bumps. Could it beeeee? YOU KNOW IT!!!! Just what I expected: a brown, UPS truck right in front of my house. Sick. I dash down the stairs as my heart rate incrased by 1000. I open the door, and the man is still in his truck. To avoid looking overly-excited, I decided to close the door and wait for the figure in the brown suit to come close to my door before I opened it again. Tick. Tick. Tick. Okay, anytime now. I open the door again. The man is getting back into his truck! What the blood?! Where's my package?!!!! Did he deliver it to the wrong person?! Did the sender write 47 and not 41? Or 43? Or any number but 41? I had the urge to check my neighbour's mailbox, but that's wrong. Ugh...I got owned today.

2006-10-06T06:58:00.000-07:00

Praise God.

My Visa is FINALLY being UPSed to me from Japan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

another random post.

2006-10-04T13:52:00.000-07:00

Mom is gone. Won't get to see her for 11 months! It's been a rough summer for both of us but God definitely carried us through. It's amazing how things turn out....

She thinks I'm going to come back with a Japanese guy. We shall see! Mwhahaha...I think she's hinting something at me. IS SHE?! Maybe it's her way of telling me to get a boyfriend. I told her years ago that I wanted an arranged marriage. It is her fault if I'm 40 and single. Boo...then no one to play with since my friends will all have a family of their own. Time to start applying to nursing homes like Yee Hong. *tear*

MemOry Lane...

[sometimes it's just too much to ask for a smile]

[the cousins and their siblings]

2006-10-02T20:17:00.000-07:00

i miss my tricycle. it was red and white with streamers. how I used to soar with that baby...standing at the back and pushing myself on that thing like a skateboard. no helmet, too.

memories are so fun.

2006-10-01T20:17:00.000-07:00

My mommy spent the entire day in the kitchen to cook my favourite dish: curry. MMmmm..mmm...mmmm... :D I was very touched to see the effort she put into this meal. This will be the last curry dish in a loooong while before I'll get to taste it again. How great is my mother's love for me.

How even greater is the Father's love for me. I cannot fathom...it is definitely beyond comprehension. It is beautiful...but even that is limited to human language and what we know of beauty...there is no word that can fully grasp this beautiful gift of grace...and love.

I LOVE CURRY! I hope there's curry in heaven.

where art thou?

2006-09-29T21:24:00.000-07:00

ahh...so unmotivated to complete these applications. MOTIVATION, where are you?! Where art thou?!!!!!

Forget you...I'm gonna look for food instead. It's crazy how I'm always so hungry even when I do nothing.

VISA...where art thou?!

On a brighter note, I got a FREE sticker from UW that reads "UW alumni"....wooohooooooo!!!!! I bet that came out of my tuition...so it's really not free. Guess that wasn't a 'bright note' after all.

song of the moment: "where o where could my baby be...? The Lord took her away from me...dooo doo doooo.....and I forget the words. Great.

This post is really for me to procrastinate. Success.

how still are you?

2006-09-28T16:44:00.000-07:00

13 Moses answered the people, "Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. 14 The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still." [exodus 14:13-14].

How beautiful is that promise God made to the Israelites. They didn't even have to raise a finger. All they had to do was stand still. That's crazy. It's a natural reflex for us to respond to our problems doing this and that and take matters into our own hands. Not doing anything is kinda unheard of. Being still requires a LOT of trust. Trust in Him that He will hold onto His promise. Sick. I'd love to be still and not do anything. But as I reflect on my day, it is filled with distractions and noise...I'm always doing something. Other than the time in devotions, do we try to quiet ourselves down? Well, by no surprise, exodus isn't the only place where we are told to be still...

10 "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." [psalm 46:10]

7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. [pslam 37:7]

*big sigh*

Trust + Be still = :D LET'S DOOOO IT!

the choices...

2006-09-28T10:45:00.000-07:00

University of Toronto - - - please let me get in.

University of Western - - - errr...at least Esther will be there.

Queens University - - - *gasp* It's the opposite way of all the
other universities! SOOOO FAR!

Brock University - - - WA? but...there will be no chinese people! Come on now, I went to Waterloo!

University of Windsor - - - *drops dead*

--> to apply to all these universities = $514.00 = money that I do not have. HURRRRAY!

lost.

2006-09-27T12:22:00.000-07:00

Mr Jason Quach took me to the baseball game. To add to the excitment that night, he decided to do something that is very typical of Mr.Quach--something stupid.

We met at Finch Station. The subway comes...asking him two times if we're getting in, this man decides to jump onto the train right when the doors are closing! So what happens? I STAND THERE IN DISBELIEF because the doors are one inches from closing and I am obviously not going to fit into that gap. Staring at each other (like in movies) and divided by the subway doors...the subway begins to move.........people in the train are watching and giggling. Because this guy was too busy laughing, he did not tell me that he was going to come back and get me. What a bum. I figured the most logical thing was that I would get on to the next train and get off the next station because he would have gotten off to wait for me there. Hmm..let's see...NOOOOOO...that did not happen. Many things crossed my mind..but mainly, I asked myself two questions: 1.) Why is Jason such an idiot? 2.) Why do I have an idiot as my friend? Hahahaha...j/k, Jason. Not knowing how to get to the Roger Centre....I really wanted to leave. As I was finding an exit, I saw signs directing me to the centre! Haha..woOOt! SAVED! But Jason was not there. Idiot. Sitting in the cold and hungry (we were supposed to eat BEFORE the game), I was thinking of the different ways that I could kill this man. But good thing we finally found each other after ONE HOUR! We actually caught the game :D Yay! (Jason said that I'm more of an idiot to befriend an idiot. He got me there).

Now...being lost in another aspect........

I don't wanna do applications anymore. I don't even know if I want to go into teaching anymore. This is a freeeaaaaaky feeling. There's so much competition in this field. Barely any job opportunities. It's so pricy to apply too. BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. I don't know what to do with my life. big question mark. Well, I always have my dream job: Starbucks. Mwahaha...

Delay Explained

2006-09-23T14:03:00.000-07:00

Visa status: still not here.
My status: still here.

Sooo...the phone rings at 1:30am on a friday morning. Update on my visa...it's still not here BUT we at least now know why it has been delayed for 3 weeks. The Immigration Office changed the policy and now requires proof of the individual to have obtained a degree in order to be permitted to enter the country as an English teacher. Did they tell my pastor? No. Does my pastor have psychic powers? No. The office didn't bother to tell my pastor, so that is why everything has been delayed...considering nothing was being processed. Phew.

Everything is in His time. I know I have given myself some unnecessary anxiety one time or another. I came upon a passage last night from Matthew 8:23-27-- when Jesus calmed the storm.

"You of little faith, why are you so afraid."

Jesus was in the boat with the disciples yet they were still afraid. Did he have to respond in the way that the disciples have imagined--i.e. to stand up and order the seas and storm to calm down? Because things don't turn out the way we expect them to, we think that He isn't working. If we know He is here, why are we still afraid? You of little faith. I of little faith. It is when the test comes then do we see how deep our faith is. His way is greater than ours.

That night the LORD appeared to him and said, "I am the God of your father Abraham. Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bless you and will increase the number of your descendants for the sake of my servant Abraham."--Genesis 26:24. That isn't the only passage that we are told not to be afraid.

happy birthday to me

2006-09-17T19:54:00.000-07:00

My relationship with the Lord began five years ago. Today, I am baptized. There were numerous obstacles from the time I wanted to learn more about Christ and to get baptized to this very day. In retrospect, with these obstacles, I can see how God had really changed some hearts, including my own, and had built me up into the person I am today. This isn't the end, but an exciting declaration of my faith. I got to share my testimony to many...including my family for the very first time. All I can say is, Hallelujah--Praise the Lord. I've always imagined this day...and it was better than I had imagined. I had the privilege to lead worship on this awesome occasion, and just being able to hear the congregation, both chinese and english, sing...my heart warmed up with an overwhelming sense of joy. If I were to imagine how the angels praise the Lord, it would sound like what I heard today when the HCEFC congregation sang in one voice, praising one Lord, proclaiming one Truth--that Jesus is Lord. That's sick!

There's still a lot that I need to work on...and to change, but yo, I know who gives me strength to run this race. The road is long...and uncertain but one thing that is certain is that I am not alone...and it is a promise that I know will not be broken. Ever.

So, with Japan. Friends, my working permit is still not in yet. Still waiting. Perhaps there's still some things I need to take care of before I'm allowed to go...? Hmmm....

*Happy Day, Happy Day........*

l.o.v.e.

2006-09-01T15:50:00.000-07:00

Sat at Chapters yesterday and read "Tuesdays with Morrie." Ran into a high school acquaintance and he happened to pick up the same book! What a kwinky dink. Anyway, the book, if you haven't read it already, is about a professor who is dying. One of his students spends 11 tuesdays with him to chat--to talk about the meaning of life. It was an easy read but a very touching story indeed. It really reminded me of the things we take for granted in life. Our ability to breathe, for example. Without even having to try, we can breathe...but for some others, this task may be a challenge. What are some little things or even big things in life that we take for granted? A good meal on the table? The love from our family? Education? Shelter? This man faces death with much courage. He embraces what is in front of him. Most of all, he spends time on what is important--relationships. He says that people may engage in their work or whatever it is but at the end they may still feel unsatisfied because these things are no replacement for love. He quotes several times that man should love or perish.

Is there someone you need to call or reconcile with?

1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

-1 Corinthians 13-

The more I reflect on this love, the more I realize how sucky I am at this. But it is through this that I see more of His love and grace, and the more I want to be more for Him.

2006-08-27T11:50:00.000-07:00

I'm bored...I even went on facebook : OH my...

Still waiting for the VISA to come in....waiting........if all goes well, then I'll be gone in like 3 weeks or so?! Craaaaaaaazy stuff. (Fiona, sorry I'm missing your wedding.......). Awwww... it'll be a while till I get to serve at church again. Tear...

Feeling the same--apprehensive/excited/anxious/sad/scared/tingly....etc. AHHHHH... my life will change drastically in less than one month's time. My little body isn't able to handle all these emotions! Ha..I'm gonna...explode!

In retrospect, it's quite amazing how things worked out, and now, leading to this path. Being back in Toronto for this summer was not part of "my" plan. Finishing off my term with a bunch of electives and the thesis, I thought things would wrap up in Waterloo. But when enrollment came along, I find out that all my courses are offered as DE (distance education/correspondence). So, why stay in Waterloo to do DE? It doesn't make sense. It was only wise to come back to Toronto. Coming back, I had my hesitations and problems. But God also provided many people back here to encourage and support me in the midst of these trials. Being back in Toronto has allowed me to take part in and experience community--the coming together of a unit. Drawing closer to God and my brothers and sisters, I believe it is a preparation for what is to come as I leave Toronto. Also being able to spend more time with my family (well, more than I would if I were to be in Waterloo, anyway!) is a plus since I'll be gone for a while. Not getting into Teacher's College was a disappointment but only for a few minutes (for some odd reason). Seeing that it is a lifelong dream of mine, I should have been more disappointed. But I wasn't, because I knew God would not close a door without opening a window for me. And now...here is this window. A window that I've always wanted to open for the longest time but was afraid to do so because I knew it was my will...but was it His? A dream of mine since I was 6 years old...is about to be fulfilled in a matter of weeks. This window is bigger than I have imagined. Afraid that I'm only fulfilling my own selfish desires, I'm being directed to a path that I have never imagined. Being able to do His work is the focus of this journey. Was He preparing me since I was 6?! Ha...that, I do not know.

It has finally hit me that I'm leaving soon. And it may be a lonely path....I'm not ready. But I have a powerful God whose got my back. I'm in good hands.

2006-08-25T21:18:00.000-07:00

some highlights of the summer....

[my dear single's club...love you guys]

[yup...this is my church.... :P @ outdoor concert]

2006-08-23T14:29:00.000-07:00

soooo.....

packing a few items...and I'm starting to feel it. Increased heart rate...and...a lil heart ache........... AHHHHH......one more month. Lots of prayer needed.

On a lighter note...I had a YOP yesterday! Oh, the childhood memories! Hehe... it's just one of those things that bring you back in time. Sick. That made my day...so did the fry supreme. Life is good.

2006-08-17T05:13:00.000-07:00

It is when we are weak that He is strong.

"My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness" 2 Cor.12:9 (NIV)

"I am with you; that is all you need. My power shows up best in weak people" (LB)

2006-08-15T17:56:00.000-07:00

VBS....vacation bible school........is fun but extremely draining. Nathan and I got the Grade 3s and 4s..and oh my, they are angels. Hee..lots of cheering and chanting and screaming but it's so good to see them smile. We're team "SkittleZ" and the kids are pretty hyped up about that name for some odd reason. Meh, whatever works for them. AHHHH...I just love them!!!! They can be a handful, or at least some of them can be, but I've got the "stop it now or else you'll get in a lot of trouble" glare....yes, that is right. Anyway, to say the least, the first day of camp, I passed out at 8pm and woke up at 7:30am. Those energy-suckers..but so loveable.

Outdoor concert at church took place last friday. Things went well :D Some technical difficulties but God carried us through. It was just so encouraging to see people work together towards this one goal. If this one group of people can do this project, imagine what the human race can do if we all worked together?! So, it's sucky to see the segregation and division amongst people because of certain "differences" like skin, language, etc. Boo to that.

Being the youngest in the family...I am pampered. Since I'll be going away, more pampering! Mwhahahahaaa....so, my bro gave me his digicam so I can document my trip! Hehe...it's going to be exciting! Wait for the pictures!!!!!!! And videos!!!!!!!!!!! AHHH..I'm so excited! Around 30 more days....hehhehehee..so giddy.

Okee dokes, hitting the park with the kiddies tomorrow... must rest up! tOodles, friends!

2006-08-04T19:38:00.000-07:00

Anna is officially done her undergraduate degree (this is assuming I didn't fail my courses). All I can say is.....WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! And praise God. It feels good to be done. So relieved. Life begins, baby! Now, I can read books for my own pleasure!!! And actually enjoy them! Yay! Yah, kinda nerdy, but there are so many books I want to read! It's a bit intimidating just thinking about life without school....what am I supposed to do????

Haha..God would not close a door without opening a window for me. Rejected by teacher's college, another opportunity has opened up...something 100000000000000x better than York. Hahaha...and oh man. I am a month and a half from fulfilling my life-long dream. No, I'm not getting married. Although...that would be 10000000000000000x better..haha..nah. One step at a time. I'm very excited about the future... :D

So, I've been just bumming around since I wrote my last exam. Eating much more... gaining the weight that I loss during exams. Hehee...I like this kinda of lifestyle...although I can't do this for the rest of my life. I wanna tour downtown! Anyone????

Hmm...while I was studying at the library, I got very annoyed. I was surrounded by these kids on the computer playing their online games. What bothered me most was their cussing! These kids were no older than Gr.7 but all they said was, "this is G**..."...."F your mom..." etc. Such vulgar language from these youngsters. It was hard to listen to and watch. Do they even know what they are saying??? It's sad. Why is the homosexual community under attack? Language like this has become part of their daily speech that it's so normal for them to use this kind of vulgar vocabulary. WhY??? So unnecessary to use that kind of language. It's stupid. I wanted to smack them silly...but I didn't. I wish I had said something. I sat there debating for the longest time if I should say something. Tough call. More excitement came. Waiting for an important email, I wanted to use the computer. These black girls were occupying all 4 of them, so I lined up. The chinese lady told them to get off because they were playing games and they weren't supposed to because those computers were only for emails and were express computers (meaning you can only use it for up to 15 minutes). All 4 got kicked out and ...more cussing. The racism card came out. It was hard to hear that as well. It broke my heart. Is this something they experience all the time? Like, do they always feel that they are being oppressed? I'm not saying it's not true, because I've studied all of this in sociology. And yes, Black people are oppressed. But is this the first explanation that they resort to whenever things don't go their way? I hope that is not the case and that people aren't racist against them. AHHHHH...where is the love? Seriously, where is the love in this world? Yo, I like Black people! I even want to marry one!!! Hehe...

ok, that is all.

2006-07-27T14:15:00.000-07:00

my brain is fried.

Other than first year, I don't recall studying so hard. Well...I do study hard..but not THIS hard. I guess it's the fear of failing my very last term. BAAAAA...the heat isn't helping either.

On a happier note....I have green tea ice cream in the freezer. Hehee...

what a random entry..just wanted to take a break. ok,....done.

2006-07-18T19:43:00.000-07:00

spent 3 hours looking for my student ID...still not found. Worried that I wouldn't be able to write my exam without it...but found out I simply needed a piece of photo ID. Haa...I feel stupid once again.

10 more days....

*sigh* Meh.

2006-07-09T14:55:00.000-07:00

So it's over.......in 4 years Ronaldinho will show you! I'll be 26 then.........

2006-07-08T07:14:00.000-07:00

The past couple of days have been rather sucky. One of the slap-in-the-face incidence this week is getting feedback from the prof and telling me that I did my assignmentS all wrong. Ha...not just one, but two. Well, it's the same prof for the 2 psych courses so his assignment and marking scheme were, essentially, identical. I actually let that bother me for two days! Got an email from him today to ask me to re-do my assignmentS and he would disregard the former ones. Ha... amazingly, I felt a lot better after that. Perhaps I realized that I really complicated the situation. Deep down, I really did not want to re-do it as I was awaiting for his feedback. But now that I know and it's really my fault...I might as well just re-do it. It'll probably take me 3-4 days... but I wasted 2 days worrying about it. I'm so stupid! But my stupidity also saved me. I submitted my assignment really early......so, at least now I know how it's supposed to be done! Yay for stupidity!

3 more weeks to go! No more play. Must study!

2006-06-29T19:37:00.000-07:00

more planning in the air....just waiting for the door to open. yes, the waiting game...doo doo dooo......

TBA.

beautiful

2006-06-25T17:32:00.000-07:00

I went for my first jog of the season tonight! woOot! I saw a couple well in their 50s walking together and holding hands...and they were chinese!! And we all know that old chinese couples do not hold hands...it's usually the husband who walks ahead and the wife is behind..ha..but tonight, it was different. I thought that was really sweet to see. There is hope, my chinese ladies. I also saw a bunch of kids riding their bikes. There was something about watching those kids play...hmm..it was very heart-warming. I miss those days when I rode on my bike with my Percy Pals :) To top it off...I passed by this place and it was filled with the smell of Jasmine. WOW....that was beautiful.

I think sometimes we really need to take some time off to be alone, and step back from the busy lives that we live...and just...breathe.

summer + fun --> :)

2006-06-22T20:53:00.000-07:00

SOOOOCCCCER, baby!!!! It's really nice to see all the different flags (although I think they should all be Brazil) that drivers stick on their cars. It's one of those things that brings a smile to my face. Ha..I know, weird. I used to play soccer! But uh..I sucked. And I remember having these bigger girls knock me down and falling on my face. Hence, I only watch soccer and not play.

Honours paper is....DONE! Well, first draft anyway. But it does feel good (probably until I get feedback from my prof to tell me to re-write the entire thing!). Another month until exams stroll along my way...but there's just so much excitement in the air right now that I don't think my little body can handle it! Oh... let's just say, September and October will be an exciting time. God is good. Things were rather rough since I got back, but I'm reminded that everyday is a test...a test of my faith and what it is to be a Christian. It's not easy, but the Big Guy up there is my strength and He has reminded me that time and time again. Praise Him.

Oh, the excitement of graduating!!!! I'm one month away..ok, more like 40 days. Life away from school finally starts!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, dream job: to work at Starbucks. I hear that they give one pound of coffee beans to the employees once a month! haha..no, I'm serious. STARBUCKS!

And it's summer!!!!! Ok, enough randomness.

banana talk...

2006-06-09T14:09:00.000-07:00

writing a paper on motivation.

yet...I have no motivaton to write this paper.

oh...the irony. I should just write on the first page that "I have no motivation...and this is my way of proving it." Pff...15%. Ok, fine, I need the 15%...need to graduate...that is my motivation.

MOTIVATION, COME!
AUGUST, where are you?????

2006-06-06T20:04:00.000-07:00

one of the greatest feeling is when you hear a song that you haven't heard in ages...and totally forgot that song existed when suddenly it plays on the radio.

Carpenters...you rock my world.

"I'm on the top of the world looking...down on creation...lalalalalaaa"

OH, the tingly feeling! Heee...can't help but smile.
the simple things in life. the beauty of simplicity. Maybe sometimes we look too hard and try too hard to entertain ourselves.

2006-05-22T08:14:00.000-07:00

the light seems sooooo dim....I'm so drained. living a life of a rebot..but thank goodness for good food to heal my soul. hehee...

August, comeeeeeeee!!!!

door to york is closed.
soo..next stop...? TBA.

oh, the excitment in the air. but for now, back to my books. *drops dead*

2006-04-14T19:49:00.000-07:00

there is a song that I found very meaningful to me...a beautiful hymn called "It is Well." And as I googled the history behind this song, the lyrics to this hymn became even more...meaningful and inspirational. Praise Him.

"Saved Alone"
by Author: James Mumford

This hymn was written by a Chicago lawyer, Horatio G. Spafford. You might think to write a worship song titled, 'It is well with my soul', you would indeed have to be a rich, successful Chicago lawyer. But the words, "When sorrows like sea billows roll ... It is well with my soul”, were not written during the happiest period of Spafford's life. On the contrary, they came from a man who had suffered almost unimaginable personal tragedy.Horatio G. Spafford and his wife, Anna, were pretty well-known in 1860’s Chicago. And this was not just because of Horatio's legal career and business endeavors. The Spaffords were also prominent supporters and close friends of Dwight.L. Moody, the famous preacher. In 1870, however, things started to go wrong. The Spaffords' only son was killed by scarlet fever at the age of four. A year later, it was fire rather than fever that struck. Horatio had invested heavily in real estate on the shores of Lake Michigan. In 1871, every one of these holdings was wiped out by the great Chicago Fire.Aware of the toll that these disasters had taken on the family, Horatio decided to take his wife and four daughters on a holiday to England. And, not only did they need the rest -- DL Moody needed the help. He was traveling around Britain on one of his great evangelistic campaigns. Horatio and Anna planned to join Moody in late 1873. And so, the Spaffords traveled to New York in November, from where they were to catch the French steamer 'Ville de Havre' across the Atlantic. Yet just before they set sail, a last-minute business development forced Horatio to delay. Not wanting to ruin the family holiday, Spafford persuaded his family to go as planned. He would follow on later. With this decided, Anna and her four daughters sailed East to Europe while Spafford returned West to Chicago. Just nine days later, Spafford received a telegram from his wife in Wales. It read: "Saved alone." On November 22nd 1873, the 'Ville de Havre' had collided with 'The Lochearn', an English vessel. It sank in only 12 minutes, claiming the lives of 226 people. Anna Spafford had stood bravely on the deck, with her daughters Annie, Maggie, Bessie and Tanetta clinging desperately to her. Her last memory had been of her baby being torn violently from her arms by the force of the waters. Anna was only saved from the fate of her daughters by a plank which floated beneath her unconscious body and propped her up. When the survivors of the wreck had been rescued, Mrs. Spafford's first reaction was one of complete despair. Then she heard a voice speak to her, "You were spared for a purpose." And she immediately recalled the words of a friend, "It's easy to be grateful and good when you have so much, but take care that you are not a fair-weather friend to God."Upon hearing the terrible news, Horatio Spafford boarded the next ship out of New York to join his bereaved wife. Bertha Spafford (the fifth daughter of Horatio and Anna born later) explained that during her father's voyage, the captain of the ship had called him to the bridge. "A careful reckoning has been made", he said, "and I believe we are now passing the place where the de Havre was wrecked. The water is three miles deep." Horatio then returned to his cabin and penned the lyrics of his great hymn.The words which Spafford wrote that day come from 2 Kings 4:26. They echo the response of the Shunammite woman to the sudden death of her only child. Though we are told "her soul is vexed within her", she still maintains that 'It is well." And Spafford's song reveals a man whose trust in the Lord is as unwavering as hers was.

Source: Equipped magazine, Vineyard Churches UK

The faith of this man is unbelievable! "Ceaseless praise" is a term that I have heard in Scripture and worship songs...and how beautiful that would be--to see the world proclaim the Truth and sing in ceaseless praise...wOOot!!!!

2006-04-12T07:36:00.000-07:00

I'm writing my very last exam on the uw campus in...less than 2 hours! woOot. And yes, I am blogging right before an exam..oh well. My brain is fried. We work hard (sorta) and play even harder..haha. So, my beautiful housemates and I spent some time during exam time acting like models (knowing that we may not make it to the modelling world, we decided to satisfy our dream by taking black and white photos). It may sound stupid..but oh man, we laughed our butts off because we suck at posing.

Exhibit #1

[you like the hair, don't you?! We are pro's...we had a fan]

Exhibit #2

[my bf and I....he's hot]

Exhibit #3

[forget "posing"...time to have some silly pics! my attempt to kill Fanny]

Exhibit #4

[didn't want to leave Alison out of this!]

So friends, another 10 days in this little town. I've been asked many times of the things I have learned these past three years in University. And, I must say, there's just so much I don't even know where to start. But, one thing for sure is...myself. It is definitely a time of discovering who you are. It's about reflecting on the things that has happened to you and seeing how you have reacted to them--because that is ultimately a reflection of your character. There may have been things that I wasn't very proud of, but it's all a learning process. I've also discovered what I do not want to be. So, what's next? York doesn't seem to be an option.....we shall see. No matter where I'll be or what I'll do, it's about the process and what I make out of it. I want to see more, that's for sure. I want to see more of Him. The more you know, the more you realize what you do not know.

Things I need to learn: gratefulness & humility...the list goes on..but for now, let's take baby steps.

2006-04-04T15:20:00.000-07:00

Exaaaaam time....and I'm blogging...baaaa...I'm so bored! For some reason, I feel so emotionally drained.....feel very distracted and tired. Go figure. Daaaang, I really hate feeling this way! What can I do to distract myself from this distraction? haha...mmm...focus on...fooOood. Mmm...

I must say, I have been blessed with the best housemates...ever! I must say, they did a good job with the surprise party--they managed to hide the birthday cheesecake in the fridge without me even knowing?! Maybe I'm just stupid. Thanks, guys.

[one of the many silly photos taken on my "20th" birthday]

Only a few more weeks till I say goodbye to this poo-smelling loo (no, really...it smells) ...bittersweet. So many changes in the summer...a bit overwhelming just thinking about it. Nonetheless, I wanna see what He has in store for me. It's going to be a summer of testing; a time to learn more about myself.

I got a beautiful present on Christmas day. It was a sunflower plant that I had to grow on my own. And after 80 days or so...it is finally blossoming. Life is amazing. Just watching the plant develop over these few months...I felt like a mother!!! Watering it...singing to it hoping it would grow faster...and just check'n up on it each day to see if it's blossoming. If only I gave that much attention to some people. Take that a multiple that a gazillion x gazillion x infinite...and you can not even fathom how much God loves us. That's sick. Oh man...I can only bow down and worship.

I really wish I did more in Waterloo....I feel like there was more that I could have done over these past three years. I don't want to graduate!!!! well...sorta. Haa...

[alison's birthday...filled her room with balloons]

2006-03-20T06:44:00.000-08:00

stupid raph. so mean.

2006-03-04T22:03:00.000-08:00

having so many doubts about my honours thesis... a tad bit nervous about it. What if I fail????? People tell me I won't... but hey, they have to say that. They're not gonna say, "hey, you're gonna fail!" BAAAAaaa!

So in love with Fabio!!!

P.S. a meaningless blog. Just wanted to let you guys know I'm still alive. that is all. good day.

home.

2006-01-30T05:27:00.000-08:00

A few things have been happening, feel'n very distracted.

Speak of expecting the unexpected...

Guess who's gonna be back to Toronto this summer???
Ha...I checked my courses for this spring term and turns out that all of them are offered as DE (distance education--aka. correspondence). So, the most logical thing is to distant myself from this school and do it at home rather than across the street from DC. I must say, it still hasn't really hit me yet. But it will... maybe in 2 months when I really have to start packing my bags and moving out. This definitely reminds me of one of my favourite verses in James when it speaks of making plans and how we don't even know what will happen the next day and so on. Point proven. Amen.

It's time to go home.

2006-01-23T20:01:00.000-08:00

He is working. In his time. Have faith.

He is my map.

2006-01-12T21:23:00.000-08:00

So I survived the second week of my 5th consecutive term at the university of waterpoo. I have to say, I was a bit burnt out…it was a bad start. But I am good now! SUPPPERB! Hmm…I wonder why there is the letter ‘b’ after ‘super’…..then people got lazy and started saying ‘supa.’ Anyway..back to my story. I actually don’t have one.

During the first week of school, I was walking to the *cough* library…and on my way there, I saw this girl bust out her school map. She was looking for the physics building as I later found out. I thought it was really cute. Ha..yes, girls tend to find every SINGLE thing cute, alright? Seeing her with her map and just wandering made me think about high school. I remember the very first day, taking out that cheap photocopied map of the school and thinking in my head that I would never know this place by heart…oh…all of this really seemed like not too long ago…but it was 8 years ago. I have two cousins who are eight! And the beauty of high school wasn’t just my wonderful group of friends (and not to mention the 4 years at the library!), but the fact that I found my faith. If it wasn’t for the trials I went through during those years of my life (and years before that too), I would not be the person I am today. And to think that is actually quite frightening. I always tell my friends that if I wasn’t in waterloo, I’d be an angry student commuting to York every day and not love life as much as I do now. I really can’t imagine where I would be today and what I would be like either. But the Lord is so good to me. Reflecting on my experiences and my many blessings (especially for my family), I cannot ask for more. I truly believe that we are not where we are by coincidence. The things we feel and experience, the trials we endure, the pain, the joy, the mourning…all of that happen to mold us into the character that we are designed to be. So, think about the people you meet, the place that you are at right now…what is the purpose behind that? That is absolutely astonishing if you think about it. WAAAAAA….

Anyhooz, I am done. I love Jesus.

...more happy moments in the loo loo...

[KCF banquet]

[most of the fellowship]

a lessOn frOm the pimple.

2005-12-12T13:53:00.000-08:00

My pimple taught me a lesson.
…I don’t learn from my mistakes.

So, I had this pimple attack last week, where 2 big ones and 2 little ones all decided to surprise me on the same day..AND in the same area!!! How pleasant. With my bad habits, and not learning from my past experiences, I decided to do what many people are usually tempted to do… pop them. And so……I did. And oh my, what a mistake…no seriously, a BIG mistake it was. For a week, I was left with a scar as big as my thumbnail...not cool. I tried to cover it with concealer, but, of course, that didn’t turn out that natural. The only way to really let it heal was to leave it alone and wait for the body to do its work. The first few days were brutal, because it looked really gross so it naturally took more time to tame. By the end of the night, the face had to be washed and my stupidity manifested for people, mainly my housemates, to see. The fact is, it was still there…

So, what is the moral of the story?

It made me think about our mistakes, sins, or lies that we may be hiding. Hiding something takes a lot of energy...it's so draining in many aspects. Healing is so difficult yet so simple. Healing takes time, it’s not an over-night-instantaneous thing. It is a process, but we expect it to happen right away. Many times, we really cannot do it ourselves. It may be difficult to leave it to God; being able to let go and leave it to Him is the biggest step to make, yet it yields the biggest reward—forgiveness + peace. Hmm...what a great reminder.

Another lesson is…

DON’T POP YOUR PIMPLES!

On a brighter note...some more happy moments.
[sci-ball w/ my beautiful housemate/burping buddy: another example of how I like to kill pictures…]

[which means I have to re-take...bleh]

P.S.
so.....ha, I just read this passage about temptation from "Purpose Driven Life" and wow.. it absolutely touched on what I blogged about a few hours ago. So here it is:

"Do you really want to be healed of that persistent temptation that keeps defeating you over and over? God's solution is plain; Don't repress it; confess it! Don't conceal it (CONCEAL...concealer...haha..get it?); reveal it. Revealing your feeling is the beginning of healing. Hiding your hurt only intensifies it. Problems grow in the dark and become bigger and bigger, but when you exposed to the light of truth, they shrink. Youur secrets. So take off yo are only as sick as your mask, stop pretending you're perfect, and walk into freedom." (Rick Warren, pp.212-213). AMEN, brother!

snOw fight.

2005-11-25T09:45:00.000-08:00

There's something about snow that gets (some) people very excited! It's so fun! There's so much to do! Seven university students decided to go play outside in the snow...haha...it was the most amazing time ever. Just forgetting about the rest of the world and simply having fun. Packing snowballs and whipping them at each other, and missing the target most of the time! The best is getting it in the face...of course, the other person's face. It is times like this that I know I will miss once I graduate. Bittersweet. Being back in Toronto, my mom would smack me for even suggesting leaving the house at 10:30pm and coming home at 1am because I want to play in the snow with my friends. Then again, Scarborough so dangerous that I don't even wanna leave the house at 10:30pm... >_< I am definitely grateful for the people in my lives, and the flexibility as a student living away from home...where we can do spontaneous things to balance out the stress from school.

Aside from the beauty of nature in the winter, there is also the concern for the people who are much less fortunate than many of us. Please keep the homeless in your prayers. Pray that there will be enough food for them (Jesus fed five thousand!) and shelter available. Spare some change or even bills the next time you pass by a homeless person. Get rid of any misconceptions that you may have of them..and see them as a person (for they are one)...one who has value in God's eyes. See them as God sees them.

"Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act. Do not say to your neighbor, "come back later; I'll give it tomorrow"--when you now have it with you" --Proverbs 3:27-28

We are called to love .

[bowling night: smiles with the KCF girls]

p.s. Ji said I ruined the picture. So we had to take another one...

2005-11-23T17:27:00.000-08:00

I am back :) After some requests, I have decided to blog again.

mmm...where do I start? So many things have happened in these past few months... a lot of insight, an abundance of joy and laughter, and a tint of fear...but hopeful at the same time.

I'm graduating soon...well, August will be the end of my Waterloo career...if all goes well. I just sent in my application package today. If God wills it, next stop is York University for Teacher's College. It's been a life-long dream of mine to teach little kids. They are such a fascinating group of people--you have no idea until you work with them. They're so full of life, so innocent, so pure (well, most of them, anyway). Since high school, I've been working towards this goal. Now that I'm closer than ever to fulfilling this dream...things seem to have taken a turn. Oh my.

These few years, after knowing Christ, I've questioned my passion for teaching. I know it's my will and my passion...but is it His plan for me? What if it's not? A sociology degree, as much as I love my program, may not get me anywhere... Yes, that may be a problem. From filling in the application forms to mailing it...no excitement, whatsoever. What happened? It's a bit frightful to think of the possibility that this may not be the road to take. I don't know whether to laugh or cry...how about both? Ha..nevertheless, it is circumstances like these that not only leave me speechless but to thank God for His grace. I don't want to make any decisions. All I can and want to do is to leave it to Him and let Him take control. My troubling emotions do not help, and I have messed up enough times to know that my decisions are usually the bad ones. This fear is nothing compared to the hope I have in Him. I am very excited about the future! I really am! I can't wait till I'm done school and see what He has in store for me. Hehe... it definitely will be a new chapter in life.

But...in the mean time...time to dive right back into my essay--Child Labour. Hmm... maybe I can talk about my insights on that in the next post. I really want to use this blog to share with you boys and girls all the things that I've been inspired with this term. Ta-ta!

[sci ball 2005: one of the many happy moments in the 'loo]